Insights from High-Level Executives on Recognising Toxic Workplaces

In 2023, I commissioned Campus Consultancy to produce two e-books with a clear purpose: to support young people entering the workforce and to guide employers in nurturing young talent. The titles, How to Be the Employee Everybody Wants to Work With and How to Be the Employer Everybody Wants to Work For, are more than just catchy phrases. They embody a mission to foster a GREAT PLACE TO WORK culture from the outset of one’s professional journey.

How to Be the Employee Everybody Wants to Work With and How to Be the Employer Everybody Wants to Work For

This week, I had the privilege of gathering a group of seasoned executives, each with years of experience navigating the complex currents of the corporate world. Our focus? To distill their hard-earned wisdom into our next project. The discussion was sharp, the insights illuminating, but one theme eclipsed all others: The Secret to Thriving at Work: What They Wish They’d Told You.

The consensus was unequivocal: Learn how to recognise a toxic workplace. These executives, hardened by experience, underscored the importance of understanding the Drama Triangle and spotting the Machiavellian tendencies that so often fuel it. Their advice was blunt and to the point—get out of these environments fast.

The Drama Triangle, a concept developed by Stephen Karpman, maps out the roles people tend to fall into during conflict or high-stress situations: the Victim, the Persecutor, and the Rescuer.

  • Victim: The one who feels oppressed, helpless, and powerless. This person often believes they have no control over their situation and seeks out someone to save them.
  • Persecutor: The critic, the blamer. The Persecutor asserts control or dominance, typically in a harsh or judgmental manner, reinforcing the Victim’s sense of helplessness.
  • Rescuer: The hero, or so it seems. The Rescuer steps in to save the Victim, but in doing so, they often reinforce the Victim’s dependency, keeping the toxic cycle alive.

This triangle is particularly poisonous in the workplace, where it can breed a culture of dependency, blame, and conflict. Recognising when you or others are slipping into these roles is the first step to breaking the cycle and cultivating a healthier, more productive work environment.

The shadow of Machiavelli looms large over the workplace, not just as a historical figure, but as a symbol of a certain personality type—one characterised by manipulation, deceit, and a relentless focus on personal gain at the expense of others. Machiavellian individuals are experts at exploiting the Drama Triangle to their advantage, pulling the strings to ensure that the cycle of conflict and dependency spins ever on, to their benefit.

In practice, these individuals might:

  • Manipulate Relationships: They sow divisions, encouraging conflicts among colleagues to keep themselves in a position of power.
  • Exploit Vulnerabilities: They identify and prey on the weaknesses of others, whether it’s a colleague’s desire to help (Rescuer) or someone’s sense of injustice (Victim).
  • Deflect Blame: These individuals are masters at shifting responsibility onto others, making themselves appear blameless, or worse, the hero in a crisis they themselves have engineered.

Then there is the subtle art of triangulation—a manoeuvre that manipulates the narrative to suit the interests of those in power. These are the moments when leaders choose not to confront criticisms directly. Instead, they manipulate a team member into acting as the intermediary, conveying messages or demands on their behalf.  The leader, meanwhile, stays in the background, maintaining a carefully crafted image of detachment, while subtly steering the narrative to their advantage.

The executives we consulted were unanimous in their warning: if you find yourself in a workplace dominated by Machiavellian behaviour, don’t stick around. Such environments are the antithesis of a GREAT PLACE TO WORK. They foster mistrust, resentment, and a culture where survival takes precedence over collaboration and innovation.

The takeaway from these conversations is clear. Recognising toxic elements early is not just crucial—it’s essential for maintaining both your personal and professional integrity. In workplaces where success is measured by how effectively one can undermine others, there’s a real danger of absorbing these negative behaviours. Escaping these environments is more than just self-preservation; it’s about committing to the principles of respect, integrity, and authentic leadership that are the foundations of a GREAT PLACE TO WORK culture.

For young professionals, the ability to identify and steer clear of toxic workplaces—especially those characterised by manipulation and drama—is a crucial skill. It’s not just about safeguarding your career and mental health; it’s about thriving in environments that genuinely value growth, collaboration, and respect.

As we continue to develop resources to help young people navigate their careers, these insights will be at the heart of our advice and recommendations, ensuring that the next generation not only survives but thrives in a workplace culture that is truly great.

#WorkplaceCulture #ToxicWorkplaces #DramaTriangle #Machiavellianism #CareerAdvice #Leadership #CorporateCulture #EmployeeWellbeing #ProfessionalDevelopment #YoungProfessionals #WorkplaceSuccess #ThrivingAtWork #IntegrityInLeadership #GREATPLACETOWORK #WorkplaceWisdom

 

How to Confront a Domineering Team Leader

In many high-pressure environments, bullying behaviours can proliferate due to high-stakes situations, rigid power differentials, and challenging schedule demands. This can have devastating impacts on employee morale, productivity, and retention. One common issue is dealing with disrespect and abuse from team leaders who hold significant power and influence within the organisation.

Goal

To create a safe and respectful working environment by addressing the abusive behaviour of a domineering team leader.

Problem

In many high-pressure environments, bullying behaviours can proliferate due to high-stakes situations, rigid power differentials, and challenging schedule demands. This can have devastating impacts on employee morale, productivity, and retention. One common issue is dealing with disrespect and abuse from team leaders who hold significant power and influence within the organisation.

In this case, a team member is experiencing rude and aggressive behaviour from two new team leaders. This bullying has not only impacted their mental health but has also negatively influenced the team dynamics and workplace culture. The need to address this pattern of abuse is crucial for maintaining a healthy and productive work environment.

Solution

Define the Problem

The most common mistake people make is to confront a single incident of abuse as if it were the only problem—in this case, a recent verbal attack. Most likely, the problem is not that single incident but a pattern of abuse. Focusing on the incident alone can lead to getting bogged down in the details of who said what and why.

Find Mutual Purpose

Approaching the conversation in a way that solves both parties’ problems is essential. Here are a few questions to help find Mutual Purpose:

  • Ask the Humanising Question: Why would a reasonable, rational, and decent person get angry and abusive like this? What is he trying to achieve and why is he so frustrated?
  • Clarify Your Long-term Goals: What do you really want from the conversation, not just for yourself, but for the other person and the relationship? This helps to take the high road and aim for a win-win solution.
  • Identify What You Respect About the Team Leader: Focus on elements you respect, which helps to establish Mutual Respect. Respect is like air; as soon as it’s absent, it’s all anyone can think about. Ensuring respect in the relationship is crucial for productive dialogue.
Prepare for the Conversation

Personal preparation sets the stage for a productive conversation. It’s important to get your head and heart right before engaging in dialogue. Once you’re ready, request a private conversation with the team leader.

Conduct the Conversation
  • Share the Facts: Present the facts of the recent abuse as you experienced them.
  • Describe the Consequences: Explain how the behaviour made you feel, impacted the culture, and put projects at risk.
  • Express Your Desire for Change: Outline how you would like to work differently together in the future.
  • Listen Actively: Ask the team leader how they see the situation. Listen to understand their perspective, which may reveal aspects of the situation you were unaware of or highlight your own or others’ roles in their frustration.
Assess the Outcome

If the team leader acknowledges the problem and agrees to work on changing their behaviour, this is a positive step forward. If the abusive behaviour continues, it may be necessary to escalate the issue to HR to protect the well-being of the staff and the organisation.

Case Study

A renowned business school addressed similar issues by training their teams to handle abusive behaviour effectively. Leaders administered pre- and post-training surveys to measure confidence in addressing disruptive behaviour. The results showed a statistically significant increase in participants’ confidence and ability to address bad behaviour both immediately after and four weeks post-training. Staff reported numerous instances of disruptive behaviour but also noted that they spoke up and addressed the bad behaviour most of the time.

Conclusion

Addressing abusive behaviour in the workplace is critical for maintaining a safe, respectful, and productive environment. By preparing effectively, finding mutual purpose, and conducting thoughtful conversations, you can help foster a positive change in your workplace culture.

This article is adapted from the original piece by Brittney Maxfield May 29, 2024.

#WorkplaceBullying #Leadership #WorkplaceCulture #EmployeeWellbeing